Saturday, August 31, 2013

It's That Time Of Year Again!



That it's nearly September conjures all sorts of happy thoughts to mind.  In a few days, throngs of people will gather in places as diverse as Lincoln, Eugene, Norman and Gainesville.  The air will be full of bands playing fight songs, roars of crowds and either joy or angst afterwards.  The national powerhouses will be playing an assortment of Cupcake State squads, truly reminiscent of lambs led to slaughter.  

I suppose there will be tailgating and other such rituals.  I suppose that some player from Ohio State or Georgia or Florida State will earn a half-dozen stickers to put on his helmet.  What happens if one of them fumbles away the game?  Does that person get a demerit, or does that show up as a bald spot on said helmet?

While I have not paid much attention to the polls, I do know that Alabama is favored to win it all, surprising no one.  Texas is supposed to be good; my guess is, if they underachieve again, the highest-paid coach in the game will have to ply his trade elsewhere, certainly for less lucre than he currently gets paid.  At least he won't have to wear that dreadful orange anymore.  My two favorite teams are picked to finish no higher than 3rd place in their respective conference divisions, so it may be a long Autumn for my teams, subjecting me to much ridicule from friends and colleagues.  As long as they come out on top of their arch-rivals, I can tolerate a few defeats.

It has been an active interlude since January.  Coaches have moved on to other spots, either willingly or not.  I have yet to see a picture of any one of them with a smile on his face.  Today, I learned that Urban Meyer has banned any spectators from watching his minions' practices from wearing a blue shirt, as it reminds him of Michigan.  I wonder what he's afraid of?

I recall incidents from years ago that remain stuck in my craw.  Like that high school kid from New Jersey back in the 70's.  Upon enrolling at Notre Dame and being awarded #7, changed the pronunciation of his name, so that it rhymed with Heisman.  I still resent that the only two-time winner of that award was from Ohio State.  I do know that, in one of those years, one of the runners up was the most exciting player of the day, Joe Washington (I can see the headline now: Sooner Slighted!).  Usually, the award does go to one of the very best players in the game.  As such, I have an expectation that the winner will also be a person of character.  While it is not always the case, I do think that several of the recent winners - Tim Tebow, Sam Bradford, Robert Griffin III - were young men who brought honor to the award.  They certainly did nothing to diminish it.  There are others (hey, Ricky Williams!  Can I borrow your laptop, Cam Newton?), who, well, let's just leave it at that.

I would be remiss if I did not comment on the biggest story of the week, that guy from Texas A&M; you know, the doppelganger for that banjo playing kid from Deliverance, the incumbent Heisman winner.  I must first confess my dislike for anyone known as Johnny Football.  Ted Williams was known by some as Teddy Ballgame, but, that was awarded to him after many years of adding to his Hall of Fame Credentials.  As for this scholar/athlete, I don't believe he has earned that title.

Speaking of earnings, it seems he was unaware that, by signing his name thousands of times on various pieces of memorabilia, someone would profit from it.  So, his university, which allegedly follows an honor code nearly as stringent as those at the service academies, has determined that the resulting profits from the addition of his signature to these items was inadvertent.  As punishment, he will be forced to sit out one half of their opening game, against that perennial juggernaut, Rice.  He will also be compelled to issue an apology to his teammates.



Way to go, Aggies, you really laid the smackdown on him, didn't you?

My point is not to debate the relative merits of the system of college eligibility.  I am, however, offended at the unmitigated chutzpah of the barons of A&M, to disregard so blatantly the rules of the game and common sense.  I hope they lose to one of the lowlights on their schedule, like UTEP, or Missouri.  That would be poetic justice, indeed.    



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